Tuesday, October 11, 2005
the cycle repeats, i was once again badly affected by the things happen today, especially today..
morning, during training , my gd buddy was in pain.. her knee was injured once again.. and she was yelling and crying in pain.. i cant do anything but watch her and lend her my hand .. to let her endure the pain... to see her in such a condition makes me feel so badly traumatised and lost..
today i fell onto my knees, cos of catching and i really slide onto the ground badly... roar..
went to holland v burger king, alot of things clouded my mind, suddenly i doubt my role as captain ... i suddenly doubt my playing to win games... i feel so badly swallowed..... yawnnzz
oh yea i do have fun playing badminton with jun sing's niece and nephews.....
guess what, as i think of wat happen today in the car on the way home.. i started to tear badly.. tears flowing down my cheeks and i couldnt control it... and i hate to be cornered and being question.. i hate to be misunderstood, i hate when ppl sees me as someone who i am totally not..
i cant control my mind anymore
maybe i'm just tired... dunno man,
i wish i have someone who could stab me in the heart using the knife...